Nothing says "I Love You" like a human heart in a box...

Alrighty then, since Supernatural will be all re-runs for the next few weeks, we'll have to entertain ourselves with alternative mediums Supernatural lovers.  Here we go.

So, I know that it's a bit late (considering the film dropped on the 16th of January 2009), but seeing as though I did devout an entire posting to Jared's newest film Friday the 13th, it only seems fair that I show the same care and allegiance to Jensen.  My Bloody Valentine, which you should have saw regardless of how absurd it wa- I mean looked..., came out in 3-D (awesome) as a remake of the 1981 slasher classic.  The film's tagline was "get your heart broken" and the film was marketed as the best date movie ever.  HA! Please.

The film was a ridiculous gore-fest that followed the usual slasher film formula to every last detail.  The one major deviation from the banal slasher flick was that the grizzly killing starts within the first few minutes of the film; no bullshit.  There is no extraneous exposition to this film to leave you yearning for someone to get their head cut off.  With that being said, I'll try to give you a brief synopsis of the film without giving anything away, so that all you slackers can go see it for yourselves if you haven't already.

Tom, played by Jensen Ackles, returns to his small home town after the 10th anniversary of a tragic mining accident he was left to blame for.  While Tom was working at the mines, there was an incidence where he

forgot to bleed the oxygen lines, and some crazy-ass miner named Harry killed his fellow miners down there in a sick display of self-preservation.  But that's not even the REAL accident I was referring to!  The REAL accident was when Harry returns after awaking from a coma (which he fittingly slipped into immediately following his freak-out in the mines...that bastard) and leaves 22 people dead after a town-wide killing spree.  When Tom returns, however, the killings start up again, and he finds himself blamed for the recent murders, and begins a crusade to prove his innocence with the help of an old flame.  Ok, so there's the movie in a nutshell without giving away and great screaming moments or gasps of disbelief.  

So, I realize that above I don't exactly sound to keen on this film, BUT, even though Friday the 13th was just all around done better, My Bloody Valentine is totally worth seeing.  Jensen looks amazing, and even though his character Tom is kind of a whimp (Dean would be so disappointed), whatever.  The writing is awful, but then again, so is the story line.  But who cares? It's an 80's remake for Christ's sake, what do you expect?  I laughed, I screamed, and I got to wear cool faux Ray Bans in the meantime.  I recommend this film to anyone who enjoys a good scream, and appreciates the absurdity that is slasher films.  Plus, I totally was thrown by the twist at the ending...get ready people!  Yea, so go see this film.  It's hilarious, and worth your time and money; just be sure that you grab some dorky friends to go see it with.

Here's Johnny! (and by "Johnny," I mean the trailer...)

Oh, hahah I forgot to mention: there is in fact a scene with a woman running around COMPLETELY ASS NAKED in hooker heels in the film...classy, I know.

3 Week Hiatus

Well, Well, Well, looks like we've finally arrived yet again on a spectacular Thursday.  However, there is something unfortunate that is definitely going to take away a great deal of luster from this normally wonderful weekday- Supernatural has gone on hiatus for the next 3 -count 'em 3- weeks.  Yea...I know.  But do not fret little chickens, the sky is not falling.  On MARCH 12, 2009 a new episode is scheduled to drop on the CW.  

 

Best yet, the episode will hopefully return us to battle of Heaven versus Hell on Earth.  It's entitled, "Death Takes a Holiday" (clever) and an online synopsis promises the return of Alastair and a continuation of the demon's attempt to break the seals.  The title supposedly has something to do with Alastair rounding up all the reapers in some small town, allowing it's residences to in essence "cheat death."

This photo is kinda funny...too bad this time it just implies a re-run -->

 

So yea...sorry folks about this 3 week lag in Supernatural beef ahead of us, but heed my word: ENDURE.  You can do it, if anyone is able to, it's you, my loyal Supernatural-ers...I'll come up with a more clever name later.  Yea, ok so in anticipation of this upcoming period of TV boredom, I will try to provide various online interviews, random videos, and other news.  Stay strong people, our boys need you!

Over and out.  

CH CH CH CH ... AH AH AH AH

Alright, yes, this is a slight digression from the theme of this blog, but whatever, this is so worth it- trust me.  Ok so Friday the 13th, came out ON Friday the 13th (nicely planned I must admit) and it stars Willa Ford, the Asian kid from Disturbia, the plant girl from Sky High, and oh yea, JARED PADALECKI.  

I must say, Michael Bay (the director) did a fantastic job recreating the classic monster of Jason Voorhees and unlike the previous recreation of the Halloween films (done by Rob Zombie...which blew chunks- seriously...) the story line actually did a really good job of keeping true to the original story line and bringing a modern edge to it.  Original aspects that spanned the original series of Friday teh 13th films were effectively meshed in this remake, so props!

Now that all of that technical stuff is through with, time for t

he important stuff:

JARED PADALECKI IS KILLER IN THIS MOVIE.

Not only is the man drop-dead gorgeous from start to finish, but his acting is credible to boot.  Unlike Jensen Ackles' performance in the recent 3-D horror flick "My Bloody Valentine-" which was slightly irking to watch as big tough Dean Winchester is acting like a little girl-  Jared's character is very similar to his character Sam on Supernatural.  He's charming, compassionate, a total badass, and smart.  He plays the character of Clay Miller, who is looking for his missing sister, Whitney, who was out camping near Camp Crystal Lake weeks before.  I'm not going to give away any more of the movie (because you should just go out and see it and support our boy working in the biz), but I will tell you that it's kind of like watching one mega-super-awesome episode of Supernatural with more gore and less freaky.  Here's the trailer:

Feast your eyes

Seriously? You're kidding right?

So, the CW today blew all of us Supernatural fans off again this week.  Another Thursday with no progress on the war between Heaven and Hell.  There was a re-run of the episode "Yellow Fever" where Sam and Dean encounter a strange phenomenon where people literally die of fright, and we also learn that Bobby can speak Japanese- random.  Anywho, the CW pulled a dirty trick, and almost caused myself a premature death similarly due to fear, by janking up their online episode schedule.  I think I might have given my roommate ample reason to murder me and I spazzed over missing a new episode that I could have sworn was scheduled to be a re-run.  No worries though, it was just a re-run- kind of a bittersweet victory, if I may.  

Fortunately, some good did come out of my slightly frightening love affair with this show.  While I was cursing the CW gods for improperly informing me of the night's episode guide, I managed to find some cool interviews with the cast.  The "most easily accessible one" being the interview of Misha Collins, who plays Castiel.  Ps. by most easily accessible I mean that it literally starts playing the moment you enter the show's main webpage... and Castiel is the most prominent angel figure on the show (as of yet...).  So, while you are yearning for more action (like myself) I recommend checking out what Misha had to say.

Here's the link to the Supernatural page on the CW website.  Take a looksy

Sex & Violence

Ok, so I have a complaint for the most recent episode "Sex & Violence" (aired 2/5/09):

It seems as though the producers, or whoever deals with the biz on the show, have had Eric Kripke (the writer), draft up a number of dispensable episodes that can evidently be thrown in wherever and whenever as space-fillers through the season.  Basically there is this creature, similar to the Sirens described in the Odyssey, convincing idiotic men to kill those most beloved in their lives, and then up and vanishing.  Oh, and did I mention that this Siren creature can morph into whatever form proves most aesthetically pleasing to that of the victim? Well, it can.  Sounds cool enough, right?

Wrong.

How can the producers do this to it's loyal fans?  You can't drop a bomb, and then expect no one to hear the "BOOM!"  They are force-feeding the public this fluffer bs, while they promised us the ultimate battle of all creation!  Where is Ruby?  What's Lilith up to? Where are the angels?  I feel like a dog with one of those contraptions attached- the ones where there'a a juicy, delicious bone dangling in front of my face, and I just can't seem to grab it, because why? Oh yea.  It's connected to a stick, strapped to my back intended to torture me forever.  

Ok, so maybe that's slightly dramatic, but c'mon.  This latest episode uses the whole "I'm worried that you're gonna go darkside on me Sam, and I'll have to kill you, but I can't because you're my brother and I love you," versus the "I have awesome yet terrible abilities that you are keeping me from fully understanding and using, Dean, because you are weak and over-bearing" dynamic again.  But what I REALLY want to know is when we are gonna get back down to business.  The whole idea of having the boys confess their deepest thoughts and worries to each other under the pretense of some outside force is fine the first couple of times.  But what really gets old is the aftermath, where the boys play the evasive maneuver, and pathetically try to dance around the true issues at hand.  

Been there, done that.  

Exhibit A: "Asylum" in Season 1.  

Exhibit B: "Croatoan" in Season 2.  

Should I continue? It's no problem, I can keep going...

Anyhow, I say let's get on with this war.

Starter Kit

Aight folks, here's the low down.

Supernatural is this show on the CW (Thursdays at 9/8 central) about these two brothers- who happen to be the most beautiful men alive- who basically travel across the country, fighting evil and expelling supernatural forces (go figure) from the natural Earth.  If you are new to the show, I recommend hauling ass, catching up on the past 3 seasons, and getting ready for the ultimate Heaven versus Hell showdown.  By this time in the show, the most influential person in the brothers' life, their father John Winchester, is dead and the closest family they have left is this man by the name of Bobby.  There are no truly prominent female roles in the show since the destruction of the Roadhouse Bar, so it's pretty much these three.  Oh! There's also Ruby- how could I forget- who is essentially, a demon who wants good to prevail.  She latches on the the fact that Sam Winchester (Jared Padelecki) has supernatural abilities (again, shameless) due to the fact that he himself has demon blood running through his mortal veins.  She wants Sam to use his abilities to destroy Lilith, but Dean thinks that her tutoring is causing Sam to more or less teeter on the edge of going full-on darkside. Dean hates her, she's got the hots for Sam, and Sam wants her as well.  If you hadn't guessed already, trouble ensues.  

So now for a really fast recap of what's been going on this season (4):

There's this macho demon-bitch by the name of Lilith who is trying to break the 66 seals and,in theory, release Satan from hell allowing him to wreak havoc on Earth.  Now there are these two angels who are trying to stop this from happening with the help of one of the Winchester boys, Dean (Jensen Ackles).  They don't trust Sam because of his demon blood, and they literally ripped Dean out of Hell (because he died) to help them fight.  So yea, a lot more shiz happens, but in order for one to get the full effect, you really have to watch the episodes...